Effective Parenting - Mental Wellness For Students 🎓

The recent news triggered some social attention and a major concern for parents. I wonder, "Are the children too stressed in schools?"

Mental health is a complex and a sensitive subject that most people are not comfortable to share and discuss liberally, but it is so important to understand and take control of mental health, as it affects greatly on a person's thoughts, emotions and behaviors.

Like all adults, children have different emotions and bad days too, they could be experiencing prolonged mental stress in school and not aware of the danger of these intense emotions could cause.

We've all been a student before...School isn't always a fun and safe place. A child could be struggling with studies, dealing with bullies, feeling isolated or having low self-esteem etc...They could be having fear, anxiety, depression or having meltdowns and not know where and who they can seek help and support.

Do you still remember when our parents used to nag at us to study hard, get a degree, find a good job and have a successful life... I know as parents, we want the best for our children, especially we are living in a competitive society today, but to the child, it could be a very stressful ordeal to reach our expectations. 

We have to be mindful that life isn't all about getting good grades, every child has different potential. Yes! A degree is a great academic honor...but even if your child didn't get a degree, it doesn't mean that they can't be successful later in life. Remember in the end, The Tortoise Won The Race!🥇

People like Bill Gates, Ralph Lauren and Steve Jobs doesn't have a college degree, are they not rich, famous and successful? Anything Is Possible!👍

 

                                                   

Now don't get me wrong, education is still extremely important as we all need knowledge and skills to achieve our dreams and goals. The world need doctors, lawyers, engineers too, but the point is to believe that our children is capable to do many great things even without the perfect grades.

The truth is, school doesn't teach you everything and life doesn't stop after graduation. The road is long for our children to explore and excel to their full potential.

Here are my personal parenting tips and advice to improve mental well-being for students/children :

What Can Parents Do? 💡🤔

1. Communicate daily

Talk to your children every day no matter how busy you are. 20 - 30 mins is a good start. Put down your phone and give them full attention. Listen patiently and don't interrupt, allow your children to express themselves, the more you communicate, the stronger the bond and you will understand your children much better as they grow. (Your child need more than a mobile device.)

2. Don't Compare Your Child with Anyone

No one likes to be compared. It is a psychological damage to a child's self-esteem and it is hard to reverse. A traumatic childhood and bad memories could stay permanently. Your child may grow up thinking that they are never good enough! Accept their flaws and love them for who they are.

                        

3. Praise Your Child Genuinely (But Don't Overdo)

Compliments made us feel good and appreciated, but be specify and genuine. Instead of saying, "Well done, good job, sweetie!" Tell your child, "Mommy is proud of you for cleaning up your room and helping your sister with her homework, you are a great brother." However, avoid excessive praises as this may cause the child to be arrogant, having a boastful attitude and nobody wants to befriend with snobs!

4. Acknowledge Their Feelings

Everyone reacts to situations differently. Please do NOT judge or shame them for their personal thoughts, but try to understand from different perspectives. Every emotions are valid. 

       

5. Positive Self-Talk & Self-Love

Teach children to believe in themselves, this will encourage them to build up their confidence and independence. Celebrate small victory and be their cheer leader! Let them know it is OK to fail, keep trying but do not quit! Use positive, powerful words and remind them about their strengths, good conducts/personality etc...

       

6. Have Realistic Expectations

Getting straight A's is impressive but don't over-stress the child and penalize them just because they didn't top the class or get the best grades. I think B Is Brilliant too! As long as the child put in their best efforts, we should be proud of them.

7. Be There For Them (Be A Support!)

Everyone needs comfort and support. Do NOT expect young children to behave like independent grown-ups, their young minds are not mature enough to handle all the problems by themselves. Let your children know that they are not alone to face the problems, they can always count on Mommy & Daddy for help and support.

8. Set Good Examples

Children will follow their parents' examples more than their advice. If you want your child to have good morals and behaviors, be a good example, a role model and practice what you preach. Children are constantly watching, observing and learning from the way we speak, react and how we treat others.

           

9. Learn From Mistakes

Every mistakes will teach the children some important lessons. Explain to them the danger and consequences of making bad choices. This will help them to analyse every situations carefully and be responsible for their actions.

10. Teach Children To Protect Themselves

Remind our children that every problem has a solution! Teach them to reach out to parents, teachers, a trusted adult/friend when they need help, but NEVER suffer in silence.

Parenting is a tough and a challenging journey. Time has changed, the classic parenting tactics need to be revised from time to time. Those parenting guide books and all the seminars/workshops you attended are a source for reference, not every answers can be found in books. Parenting is a Hands-On skill and experience, rather than a theoretical knowledge.

In my honest opinion, there is no perfect formula for parenting, the guideline is to do what works the best for your children.

     

Our role as a parent is to protect, guide, discipline our children and help them to become a better person. Whatever your parenting strategies and beliefs are, I am sure at the end of the day, all parents want to raise a strong, confident, healthy child.

Always remember...

Your child's mental health is more important than their grades. A positive mind and a resilient child is much likely to overcome adversity, to achieve great success and happiness in life!🏆

Spread the words...Mental Health Matters! 💚 

"If there is eternity, I would spend an endless lifetime, to keep my children safe under my wings." ❤ ~ Mommywarrior77

👉 Mothers are Angels! 💯😇💖

*** Disclaimer ***

(This blog is written by Mommywarrior77. All information provided are based on my personal experience as a mother with 2 young children. No medical advice intended. Please seek professional support.)

6️⃣ Things I Can't Live Without

Have you ever thought about what are the things that you can't live without? I thought this is a fun topic to blog about. Well, let's not talk about the basic survival things, like oxygen, food, water, shelters, clothings and money that everyone needs...Aside from those, there are some things that I definitely can't live without!

1. MY 2 SWEETHEARTS
My children are everything to me. They are my strength, my joy, my hope and my world. I am blessed and thankful to have them. They give me the reason to live and to stay strong. Sometimes they made me really mad and even broke my heart, but I will always love them to the moon and back! 

2. DREAMS / GOALS
Dreams and goals are important reminders to help me stay focused, motivated and to strive better everyday. Life without a dream/goal is like a ship with no destinations. I believe everyone has a purpose in life and to do something big. I would not want to be waking up every day, not knowing what I should do with my life and live with regrets later. No way!

3. LOVE
Love comes in many forms. Relationships, friendships, kindness, compassion, humanity and self-worth etc.. If there isn't love, the riches of life are worthless, it's hard to live a happy and fulfilling life without love. With love, all things are possible and I do believe love will keep us alive! (Oh..did I mentioned that I'm a hopeless romantic too?😁)

4. MUSIC

I need music everyday! Yes, I've said that many times in my blogs. Music makes me feel alive, energetic and it inspired me to stay positive about my passions. It helped me get through those bad times and rough days. I remember blasting all the catchy love songs and crying my heart out after my first break-up! It felt better, isn't it? Yep! Music is a great therapy indeed. No doubt! 

 
Music is a language that connects people too. I made a lot of friends around the world who share the same interests. I can't live without music for sure! I've been playing music since high school and I can talk about music all day! I could listen to my favorite playlists over and over again. Singing in the bathroom is my daily ritual anyway. Haha! I guess music flows through my veins.

5. MOBILE PHONES / LAPTOP
Let's face it! Our generation is so attached to the latest technology and social media. The mobile phone is a very important tool to connect people.

We use it everyday to chat, send text messages, read news, check emails, take pictures/videos & selfies and upload them on social media. Omg! I would feel so weird and lost if I don't have my phones or laptop with me and the biggest nightmare is when the battery is flat!!! I sleep with my phones every night, tell me I'm not the only one! LOL! 😂

(By the way, my laptop of 5 years broke down recently and I rushed down to the store to get a new laptop the next day. It's so good to be blogging with my new lappy and get all the job done!)

6. CHOCOLATES !!!
Oh yeah!...I know chocolates are so sinful and fattening but they are sooooo hard to resist, especially when you have sweet tooth like me or sugar rush syndrome most days. Mmmm...Chocolate is a delicious cure for a bad day! It does make everything better and sweeter!...🥰

So what are some things that you can't live without? Share with me and comment below. 

The Mommywarrior77 Blog™️ is honored to be featured in the list of Top Singapore Bloggers 2020 by Edarabia.com Truly grateful for the recognition. Thank you and much love! ☺️😘

Knowledge Is Power! (Never Stop Learning) 📚

Let's face it! In this society and the generation that we are living today, competition is everywhere around us...In school, at work, in a job interview, etc. Therefore, learning is essential for everyone! Good education systems and resources are very important for our future generations. 


In my opinion, competitions aren't always negative and stressful... Sometimes, it can be a form of motivation to strive better. Everyone aims for the best and no one like to fail. The more knowledge and skills you have, the better chance to succeed and achieve your goals. 

As parents, we want the best for our children. Don't we? Since the day they were born, we are constantly teaching them to walk, talk, write, read, helping them to build up their motor skills with educational toys and learning tools in their early years. 

We send our children to school to learn different subjects, languages, moral values and social skills that would help them in their adulthood in the years to come. I am sure every parent want their child to shine like a star, to have a bright future and hope they'll be successful in life.

Parents and teachers play an important role in a child's learning journey. As a work-at-home mum, I'm always looking for good learning materials for my little ones. I encourage my children to learn as much as they can. That way, they can excel, explore new things, to discover their potential and talents. 


My job as a parent is to give my children the best support they need, guide them in life and help them build a good attitude in learning. 


I'm glad that with the advanced technology and resources we have today, there are many helpful educational materials to make learning fun and interesting for both children & adults.


The mind of a child is full of curiosity, they are always eager to explore and learn. Children are attracted to bright colors, funny faces and colorful pictures, that is why cartoons are their top favorite channels. So, with the right educational tools, learning can be full of joy and excitement. 


I recently came across an interesting website with lots of cool themed worksheets that are customized for children in different age groups. They sent me some worksheets the other day and I would like to share with my readers. There are many lovely designs and different types of worksheets on their website (eg: maze, puzzles, games, mathematics, word tracer and more...) I think the kids would love them!


These worksheets can help the kids to improve their spelling, grammars, vocabulary, writing skills and penmanship as well. Afterall, practice makes perfect! 😉


I teach my son spelling every week. (He is Primary 2 this year) I guide him to write proper sentences in his compositions and to speak with confidence during his Show & Tell presentation in school and..........Happiness is when your child brings home his Spelling test with a full score! (10/10) Well done, Son! Mummy is very proud of you! Keep up the good work! 😘👍

Personally, I'm not one who focus too much on academic results. For me, I believe life is more than just getting good grades, there are things like morality and EQ that are equally important. However, I believe in learning as much as possible, to gain knowledge. I want my kids to enjoy learning every day and have a pleasant school life. As I mentioned in my earlier blog, education is indeed important because the world needs future doctors, scientists, lawyers, engineers, etc..


Knowledge is power! Knowledge comes from learning and leaders never stop learning. Education is the key ingredient to achieve long term success!


Every child deserves the best education! 
Whether you are a parent or a teacher...I believe we share the same goal, to improve our children's lives and to build a better future.



Help your kids strengthen their summer spelling knowledge with this spelling test! For more spelling resources, visit Education.com!

Confucius once said...
"Education Breeds Confidence.
 Confidence Breeds Hope. 
 Hope Breeds Peace."


Always keep learning, because life never stops teaching! 😉


Blogger Mommywarrior77

Love Builds A Happy Home ❤️🏡

I love children.

I've always dreamed of having a big family with lots of kids around the house. I love their innocent minds and purest hearts. Their lovely smiles and funny giggle always warms my heart! 😍

Raising a kid here in Singapore is pretty expensive, so two is just perfect for me and I'm very thankful to be blessed with 2 beautiful kids in my life. I admit I'm not the most patient mum in the world, but I'll always protect them, love them with all my heart and provide them the best I could. That is my promise, my responsibility to my children and I'll never break that promise!

Some days, my kids made me really upset and drive me nuts, but as a mother, you'll always see the beauty in them and forgive them anyway. No mothers I know would ever hold grudges against their own children.


Hence, parenting is a challenging journey. Personally, I feel that every child is unique in their own ways so I wouldn't want to compare them with anyone and I don't follow a fixed formula in parenting because a lot of answers are never found in books. To me, it's all about trial & error and being flexible for your child's needs, but that's just my opinion.

I'm sharing some thoughts on family life and parenting today because I feel strongly for my close friends (mothers too) who shared with me how tired and frustrated they are, to manage everything alone when their husband is at work or out of town for months. I could relate to how they feel because my hubby works long hours too, sometimes, I feel so exhausted doing the endless house chores and mothering the kids at the same time. 


There are days when I am so busy with the kids and my online biz that I hardly have much time to blog. Most days, I only get a few hours of sleep. (But that's fine, I don't sleep a lot anyway.lol)


It gets worse when you are unwell and didn't have time to rest when you don't have any source of help near you.. No nanny, helper, in-laws, grandparents or someone you trust to help you out... Can you imagine how crazy and stressful it is, with zero help?... Homemakers are not made of steel, we need rest too, like everyone else!


All I could do was give my friends hugs for comfort and support. Lend them my ears to listen, whenever they want to vent their frustrations and unhappiness. 


Besides the struggle...Do you realize that Mothers are always the ones who get judged and blamed? It is no wonder they are so stressed out and emotionally drained when they get judged almost everything...ALL THE TIME!


Say for example, when the kids misbehaved, show bad manners and attitude or get into some troubles, everyone starts pointing fingers at the mothers but rarely at fathers. Hmmm, but isn't parenting suppose to be a teamwork?... Well, I don't think it's right to blame only the Mums for bad parenting. Ah yes! I know Dads are the sole breadwinners, they work very hard every day to provide for the family, but a Daddy's role is equally important in parenting.


Actually, I have seen some good Daddies around lately. I think the new-age Dads are very cool! I must say I'm really impressed by how dedicated and devoted some fathers are. 

I once heard a Daddy singing "Baby Shark" to his toddler on a long bus ride, even when he sang out of tune, lol..I still think that was really sweet! Men are often viewed as a muscular and manly figure, so when a Dad sings a kid song or nursery rhymes to his child in public...Wow! You got my attention, Mister! Thumbs up, Daddy! 👍 


I feel that in order to build a happy family, both Mummies and Daddies have to be involved in parenting because they are the ones who shape the kid's personalities and the person they grow up to be.

My point is, parenting is a team effort! It is never only the Mummy's or Daddy's duty to do certain roles, it's all about supporting each other and teaching the children the right things as parents. 


Keep in mind that your spouse is your life partner, not a slave or a machine, it's not humanly possible for anyone to take all the roles in parenting alone. Do not take anyone or anything for granted. Your partner needs support, your attention, understanding and appreciation too. 

The children are your labor of love..Therefore, both Mummy and Daddy play the most important roles in the parenting journey. Kids learn from their parents, always! When you show love, respect and kindness to others. Chances are, your kids are more likely to follow the same way you did and become loving adults in the years to come.


Parenting is never easy because we all have emotions and bad days too, that is why you need support from your partner when you feel emotional or need some time-out! In my opinion, there is no perfect parenting nor a perfect family, only responsible parents who work hand in hand together. 

A warm and happy family isn't built overnight, it takes years, a lot of patience and hard work from both parents...But together, you can build a happy family so long as you work as a team... and happy home, raise happy kids! 👦👧

Let me know what's your thoughts on Parenting / Parenthood? 

Happy Parenting, Mummies & Daddies! 😘 

Blogger Mommywarrior77

The Pride Of Motherhood 👩💓

Motherhood.

If you're a Mum, you know the struggle is REAL and the journey of Motherhood isn't always a smooth-sailing ride... I overheard a conversation the other day and I'll share my personal thoughts on Motherhood.

I am sure we have seen and heard many debates on Working Mums (WM) vs Stay-At-Home Mums (SAHM) and the battle never seems to end...

Personally.. I think such debates are pointless and quite silly because at the end of the day, we did it for our kids and the family so what's the purpose of proving which group gets more credits, we aren't earning for brownies or rewards points, are we? lol 😁


In my opinion.. I feel that as mothers, we should help and support one another instead of attacking, shaming and judging. If you are a working mum, it's cool to bring the bacon home, if you are a stay at home mum, that's wonderful to witness every precious milestone of your child each day.

My point is...Respect the roles of both group of Mothers. I have many friends who are working mums and I love them like sisters and as a stay/work at home mum myself, we face many challenges too and not every SAHM live a Tai-Tai (aka rich lady) lifestyle...and yes! I do understand the work stress for working mums as well..My friends complained to me all the time about their work projects,  long hours, frequent meetings and the nasty office politics they deal with everyday but stay at home mums have tons of endless housework and they hardly have any me-time for themselves, they don't get paid for doing everything, they got ZERO welfare, they have to deal with the cruel criticism and unfair judgement from the public as well. 

Indeed..Motherhood is a tough journey for both working mums and stay at home mums but it should NEVER be a competition or humiliation. I really think all mothers (SAHMs and WMs) deserve Equal credits, respect and recognitions in the society.

Just to share...years ago, a single lady in her 40s once asked me..."M, what do you do at home all day? Wow! honestly, I felt really pissed at that moment and I think that was kinda' rude.. I wonder why did she even asked when she already knew what SAHM does! But yes..we don't go to work like the office lady and getting a paycheck every monthly but we are not sitting all day, munching chips and catching Korean dramas.Lol! We are equally busy taking care of the kids everyday, making sure that they are well & fed and running the daily errands. 

It's really sad that people are so shallow and judgmental these days. No offense and pardon me but I wonder how does she feel when someone asked why isn't she married at her age. Ahh.. there you see! Sensitive and tactless questions like this are totally uncalled for and it only tigger tensions and unhappiness so it's best to zip up especially when people can't relate to the situations. 

Well..It's always easy to judge and make senseless remarks on others when they can't relate what Motherhood is all about and a mother's role in the family.. Say for example, if someone who can't cook or doesn't clean up the house, how can they truly understand and relate to the exhaustion from fixing meals for the family and doing the housework everyday?..What about pregnancy, childbirth and breastfeeding? Hey, not even a dad can relate that..just saying, Lol! So it really does take a mother to understand a mother! Period.

I hate to judge without knowing the truth, but that's me! Besides, it's really none of anyone's business whatever the decisions the mothers made for the family. Every household has different needs and demands. There is no standard formula in motherhood so why is there a need to compare who is better?

Here's a cool video that every mothers / parents should watch. Perhaps many have seen it before and I think it's one of the best motherhood advertisement that I have seen so far that speak a thousand words with a positive punch!👍

Motherhood is messy, crazy, tiring, stressful, exciting, rewarding and this list go on.. The last thing any mother need is someone making hurtful remarks to belittle and attack them. 

The next time you ask such questions..think about how others feel and how YOU feel when someone ask you a sensitive question back, if words that may sound hurtful and unkind..Don't do it! because those words that are spoken can never be erased! It's never cool to go around insulting and mocking mothers or anyone so it's wise to think before you speak. Learn to speak with respect, kindness and intelligence, that way you'll make a friend instead of an enemy.

I have the highest respect for many strong mothers that I've met, both working mums and stay at home mums. At the end of the day, we all play the SAME role of a mother. Please do not feel worthless just because you don't bring money home for the family and don't feel guilty for working during the weekends. You Are Still A Good Mum, Remember that!😎  

Whatever the choice is..be proud of your role as a mother. Keep in mind that we do NOT have to live in the opinions of others. While the battle will still continue I'm sure, but allow me to speak with the pride of a mother. Thank you.😘

*Remark : This blog is specially dedicated to all the amazing mothers / Mommy Warriors for their hard work and sacrifices for the family. Love you Mums! 💕

Blogger Mommywarrior77

Be A Buddy, NOT A Bully! 💪

Bullies...

I often wonder..why do people bully? was it for fun? trying to be cool? or simply just being a jerk! 😠

Anyway, I'm sure many of you have at least encountered a bully at some point in life or know someone who was bullied.. Unfortunately, bullies are everywhere..In schools, office, on the road, internet, public places and even in families sadly...


I recently witnessed a bully case in school that triggered me to blog this topic. Indeed, bullying is a huge social problem globally and it is a major concern for any parents.


Just a brief flashback...I was a bullied teen during high school. Being chubby and nerdy, the bullies in my class would picked on me all the time... Playing pranks on me, making fun of me with nasty name-callings. Whatever!..School wasn't a fun place for me, I hated school! I dragged myself to school everyday, I was an average grade student with good conduct but deep inside...I was counting down to graduation day. I'm so thankful that I survived those nightmares when I'm finally done with school, I was 'freed' at last and I could breathe freely again...

Now I am a mother of 2 young kids..I wouldn't want my kids to suffer the horrible experiences I had in school..No one deserve to be bullied! I wished someone taught me some self-defense so I could protect myself when the bullies attacked me. So...I encourage my son to learn Taekwondo, he is almost 7yo and has earned a Green belt.👍😊

Sometimes, I regretted being too timid because I was so afraid to challenge the bullies to defend myself and report them. I would just tolerate but feel miserable inside. I felt weak and so little about myself. That is one tough lesson I've learned in life, so Never put up with any bullying, seek help early and talk to someone about your problems. You don't have to suffer this alone in silence.


Do remember.. Silence isn't always golden. When you need to step up, speak up and defend yourself..Do It! Be brave enough to tell the bullies to Stop and Back off! Hiding your fear, your sadness and crying won't ever solve any problem! In fact, that would feed the bullies' ego and encouraged them to continue the bullying. When I read news about children / teenagers who committed suicide, it breaks my heart when young lives are lost in the result of prolonged abuses & bullying.😟


When I started working and learning about life as I grow..I became tougher, smarter, and I am grateful for my mentors who guided me along the way. I learn how to protect myself during danger, crisis and tacky situations, etc.. Through many life experiences and setbacks over the years, from zero to hero.. I am a stronger and wiser person today! A lady with confidence, strength and positive vibes.😊 Today, I am NO longer the nerd I was back in school. I remember no one ever noticed me during school days, I was invisible! Hmmm.. But now, I got attention from the public, strangers and I made heads turned..Hahaa! Many of my classmates couldn't recognise me when we met during our school gathering recently...There you go! The story of "The Ugly Duckling" does exist in real life and I am one good living example.😘


Here's a cool song by one of my favorite Singer, G.E.M. Love this song so much and the MV too..I can relate to the song and it's perfect for my blog! Check it out.. It's pretty awesome! Enjoy.. 😍😎

                                              
             Click here ➡️Song lyrics in English #SayNoToBullying


Studies have shown that bullies are loners, insecure, self-centered and attention seekers who are unhappy about life and themselves..Many came from violence, broken families and grew up from bad childhoods.


Whatever the reasons may be.. Any form of bullying is still Wrong! It Is Never Cool To Bully! I've always tell my children..it is ok to be angry at times, but it is NOT ok to bully or hurt someone! There is no sensible or justified reasons to bully anyone! Young or old. Period!


As parents, it is our duty and responsibility to educate our children proper manners, moral values, self-discipline and respect. We should be role models and practise good examples for the kids to learn from. No parents would ever want to see their kids get hurt or being bullied anywhere, so we must teach our children some basic self-defense so they learn to protect themselves when there is danger because anyone could be a target for the bullies!

A physical scar may faded over time but an emotional scar will never be healed completely. Thus, it is hard to fix something that is badly damaged.

Prevention is always better than cure!

Let's remind ourselves and teach our children to practice kindness, compassion and treat everyone with respect always. Share and Pass it on... #SayNoToBullying

Blogger Mommywarrior77