Be A Buddy, NOT A Bully! 💪

Bullies...

I often wonder..why do people bully? was it for fun? trying to be cool? or simply just being a jerk! 😠

Anyway, I'm sure many of you have at least encountered a bully at some point in life or know someone who was bullied.. Unfortunately, bullies are everywhere..In schools, office, on the road, internet, public places and even in families sadly...


I recently witnessed a bully case in school that triggered me to blog this topic. Indeed, bullying is a huge social problem globally and it is a major concern for any parents.


Just a brief flashback...I was a bullied teen during high school. Being chubby and nerdy, the bullies in my class would picked on me all the time... Playing pranks on me, making fun of me with nasty name-callings. Whatever!..School wasn't a fun place for me, I hated school! I dragged myself to school everyday, I was an average grade student with good conduct but deep inside...I was counting down to graduation day. I'm so thankful that I survived those nightmares when I'm finally done with school, I was 'freed' at last and I could breathe freely again...

Now I am a mother of 2 young kids..I wouldn't want my kids to suffer the horrible experiences I had in school..No one deserve to be bullied! I wished someone taught me some self-defense so I could protect myself when the bullies attacked me. So...I encourage my son to learn Taekwondo, he is almost 7yo and has earned a Green belt.👍😊

Sometimes, I regretted being too timid because I was so afraid to challenge the bullies to defend myself and report them. I would just tolerate but feel miserable inside. I felt weak and so little about myself. That is one tough lesson I've learned in life, so Never put up with any bullying, seek help early and talk to someone about your problems. You don't have to suffer this alone in silence.


Do remember.. Silence isn't always golden. When you need to step up, speak up and defend yourself..Do It! Be brave enough to tell the bullies to Stop and Back off! Hiding your fear, your sadness and crying won't ever solve any problem! In fact, that would feed the bullies' ego and encouraged them to continue the bullying. When I read news about children / teenagers who committed suicide, it breaks my heart when young lives are lost in the result of prolonged abuses & bullying.😟


When I started working and learning about life as I grow..I became tougher, smarter, and I am grateful for my mentors who guided me along the way. I learn how to protect myself during danger, crisis and tacky situations, etc.. Through many life experiences and setbacks over the years, from zero to hero.. I am a stronger and wiser person today! A lady with confidence, strength and positive vibes.😊 Today, I am NO longer the nerd I was back in school. I remember no one ever noticed me during school days, I was invisible! Hmmm.. But now, I got attention from the public, strangers and I made heads turned..Hahaa! Many of my classmates couldn't recognise me when we met during our school gathering recently...There you go! The story of "The Ugly Duckling" does exist in real life and I am one good living example.😘


Here's a cool song by one of my favorite Singer, G.E.M. Love this song so much and the MV too..I can relate to the song and it's perfect for my blog! Check it out.. It's pretty awesome! Enjoy.. 😍😎

                                              
             Click here ➡️Song lyrics in English #SayNoToBullying


Studies have shown that bullies are loners, insecure, self-centered and attention seekers who are unhappy about life and themselves..Many came from violence, broken families and grew up from bad childhoods.


Whatever the reasons may be.. Any form of bullying is still Wrong! It Is Never Cool To Bully! I've always tell my children..it is ok to be angry at times, but it is NOT ok to bully or hurt someone! There is no sensible or justified reasons to bully anyone! Young or old. Period!


As parents, it is our duty and responsibility to educate our children proper manners, moral values, self-discipline and respect. We should be role models and practise good examples for the kids to learn from. No parents would ever want to see their kids get hurt or being bullied anywhere, so we must teach our children some basic self-defense so they learn to protect themselves when there is danger because anyone could be a target for the bullies!

A physical scar may faded over time but an emotional scar will never be healed completely. Thus, it is hard to fix something that is badly damaged.

Prevention is always better than cure!

Let's remind ourselves and teach our children to practice kindness, compassion and treat everyone with respect always. Share and Pass it on... #SayNoToBullying

Blogger Mommywarrior77

Before Saying...I Do! 💏

Not long ago, I was invited to a private group interview on the topic "Successful Marriage". For the record, I have been married for over a decade and counting...(*but I'm not old btw..) 😁😄 I guess I'm qualified to offer my humble advise and thoughts on this very popular discussion.

During the interview, the host asked.....

"What is your best advise for people who are getting married and the newlyweds..."

...and I replied,

In my opinion, a Marriage is much more than just a paper and the marital status. When you decided to marry that special someone, you do not just married to the love of your life, you married to his/her family as well.

Trust me, that is a fact! I believe those who have been married for many years would agree with me, that is why building a successful Marriage isn't easy because there will be many unhappy, tacky situations and new challenges along the way that could involve your spouse's family, eg; siblings, relatives, etc.. that unfortunately may effect your relationship when couples start having disagreements and disputes over family matters.You may have a hard time blending into the family and you will be exhausted playing the Angel all the time when your spouse's family don't even appreciate your efforts in the end, so married life isn't as simple as it looked.  

I am NOT an expert in Marriage advise but I will share my perspective on Marriage / Married Life based on my personal experience for the readers as a general reference.☺

Before you propose and say I do......

1) Never rush to get married! Don't feel pressure to marry because you feel lonely, unhappy being single or your parents keep nagging at you. Marriage Is A Lifetime Commitment. It is better to marry later than married to the wrong person. 

People said, "Love Is Blind". Indeed..lovers can be 'blinded' when they are madly in love, people do get impulsive and married too early and then regret later. So give yourself sufficient time to know the person better and his/her family as well.

2) Avoid staying too near or living together with your in-laws. You can always bring the kids to visit your in-laws every weekly/monthly or as often as you want and it is so convenient to travel around any part of the country. Personally, I would prefer NOT to stay too close or living together with my in-laws because it can cause some inconvenience, unnecessary stress and tensions living under one roof. Besides, I need my privacy! Lol😝

When we talk about in-laws, it doesn't only refer to the Father/Mother-in-law alone, that also include the unmarried sister/brother-in-law who are still living together with the parents. These are the people who may gossip / badmouth you and create many family dramas because they could be jealous and feeling insecure when they see you as a Threat in the family, especially when you are intelligent, vocal and outshine them in many aspects. So if you do have a choice, be wise and distance yourself from those nasty in-laws! They are one of the Biggest deal breaker imo.

3) Always protect your loved ones. Do NOT let anyone bully your spouse and children. If you know your spouse/children is right, speak up and stand by them. Remember, silence isn't always golden! Your spouse deserve all the respect in the family. He/she doesn't have to put up with the nonsense and be treated unfairly. Always Do What Is Right! A strong family is one who stays united.💗👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 

4) Choose your battles. Put down your ego. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose..Hey, it's no big deal!😎 You don't have to win all the time, there is no medal for winning anyway, Haha!..and Marriage isn't a competition. It is silly to fight over small matters, don't let those minor things effect your Marriage/relationship, it's just not worth it!

 

5) Mutual respect and good communication is extremely important in a healthy, successful Marriage. Without communication and respect, I don't think any Marriage / Relationships can survive in a long run and it may lead to many serious problems later. Make some efforts to communicate daily. Have a heart-to-heart talk with your spouse often. Listen when he/she speak, do not interrupt or judge anything. Do acknowledged that everyone have different emotions on each situations..Be a good listener and be supportive. Praises and compliments never harm.😘👍

6) Keep the Fire burning..it doesn't matter how long you are married. Don't forget to groom yourself, hit the gym or do some sports to keep fit. Put some efforts on your physical appearance and dressings.When you look good, you feel good inside and out, it boost your charm and confidence big time! (*Speaking from my own experience.LOL!😁)

Don't forget couple time.💏 Always make time for your spouse. Romance is very important in a Marriage. Be creative and spontaneous. Why not start dating your wife/husband again? You could get someone you trust to babysit your kids and go out on a date with your spouse. Perhaps a romantic candle-light dinner, midnight movies, supper or evening strolls at the beach under the stars...Who doesn't like sweet surprises, right?😘

Marriage is a teamwork. It takes two to tango.. NEVER take anyone or anything for granted! A happy and successful Marriage need to be nurtured with a lot of hard work, sacrifices, patience, understanding and consistent commitments from both husband and wife.👫

......Whenever I see old loving couples holding hands strolling at the park, my heart melts with warmness and sweetness. They have proven to the world that True Love does exist!...😆😄💕

Blogger Mommywarrior77

Friends or Foes? 😇😈

As some of you already know that I’m a Blogger, many of you have visited my website and read my blogs but I keep a low profile for privacy and security reasons.

I have been blogging for a few years now, I enjoy writing and expressing myself. I blog about Life, Family, Parenting, Motherhood, Social Matters and random stuff. I made some really cool friends on the net but I also met many cyber bullies, keyboard warriors, and trolls in some active group chats and forums etc..

Hence, we can never understand their weird notions and their intentions. As a person who values integrity and true friendships, I will share some advise to warn people to be careful with the circles of ‘friends’ around them.

I have compiled some reliable information into a Checklist below. These are important rules to help you understand if you are dealing with a Friend or a Foe?😇😈

*** KEEP IN MIND ***

Rule #1 : Do NOT share too much personal information with casual 'friends',  you never know if they may betray you or expose your secrets with others and twist the story around for everyone to condemn you.

Rule #2 : Trust no one! Don’t be too trusting just yet. Set your boundaries and your comfort zone, if they are your real friends, you will know it sooner. Observe them.

Rule #3 : Beware of those who calls you Bro, Sis, Babe, Hun etc.. Not everyone who smiles at you are real friends. Keep in mind that even Salt look like Sugar!

Rule #4 : People change over the years, you can't expect the friends whom you haven't seen for a decade are the same nerds during school days. Someone who used to be kind and gentle could possibly turn out to be a monster or your worst enemies. Friends come and go, only the true ones stick around to share your happiness and sadness.

Rule #5 : Stay away from fake friends, if those who intend to harm you, badmouth and sabotage you..Hey! these aren’t genuine friends at all. Delete them, eliminate them, block them and strike off their contacts. Trust me, you don’t need them in your life!

Rule #6 : Choose your friends wisely. Stay with friends who are sincere, honest, supportive and they make you feel comfortable and who will never leave you out.

Rule #7 : Do NOT feed cyber bullies!!! Bullies are loners, self-centered and they are Never cool! The more you befriend with the bullies, the more negative vibes and troubles you will attract. Respect everyone equally, no one is superior than the others, stop sucking up and acting like clowns!

Rule #8 : Do NOT follow and believe everything blindly! Think and observe. A coin have 2 sides, listen and understand both sides of the stories before you act or judge anything.

I hope this Checklist can be a guide for people who have doubts about the friends around them. Indeed, everyone need friends but be very careful who you trust and hang out with because we are living in a complicated world surrounded by both "Angels" and "Devils" in our daily lives.

Share and Repost if you think this blog is helpful. Peace! 😎✌

Blogger Mommywarrior77