Things I Wish I Knew When I Was Younger

Have you ever wondered what would your life be if you had taken a different route on your career, relationships and goals etc...

I had a deep conversation with a good friend recently that triggered some flashback memories...

 

Over the years, I've learned many important lessons on the philosophy of life and humanity. I must admit that there are some things I wish I knew earlier that would probably saved my time and perhaps make better life choices. Nevertheless, I will share some random thoughts and my heartfelt advice from these valuable life lessons and hope it evaluates your wisdom and perspectives too.

Things I Wish I Knew When I Was Younger...

Set Boundaries

Be careful of the kindness and generosity you give. Unfortunately, many people are takers without gratitude. If you are an Empath like me, it is extremely important to set boundaries to protect yourself from being taken for granted and drained by energy vampires. Set your limits, too much empathy can be harmful. Don't ever burn yourself out to keep others warm.⚠️

Don't try to fit in a group and be a people pleaser just because you are afraid to stand alone. Standing alone is better than being disrespected. Understand that not everyone will like you and that's OK. If they don't appreciate your kindness and reciprocate your efforts, these are not your people and you are in the wrong tribe.

Grades Don't Define Intelligence

I know this is not a favorite opinion.lol, but I will say it anyway. Higher education doesn't always make someone smarter or superior than the rest. Keep in mind that a smart and successful business man doesn't have to be a Math genius. Doing well in schools doesn't mean you'll do well in life. School and working life is a totally different setting. Many intelligent, wealthy and successful people I know never had a degree, so don't berate yourself and devalue your worth! It is superficial and stereotype to judge intelligence solely on academic grades. Intelligence and wisdom is a lot more than just papers.(I do agree with Mr. Elon Musk!😊)

 

  

Age Doesn't Define Maturity

Maturity is reflect on how a person react and respond to various circumstances. It's about responsibility, accountability, self-discipline and the right attitude. Don't be fooled by age, a 40yo could still 'act' like a 14yo on how they handled situations and crisis.

 

True Beauty Is Being Who You Are

Most women feel insecure about their weight, because being 'thin' is projected as the beauty standard in the society, but what is physical beauty if you have a bad character? For me, there is no ugly people, only ugly personalities! Babes, you gotta' stop comparing yourself with the runway models and celebrities. 

Beauty comes in different sizes and shapes. You are gorgeous if you have a great personality and a beautiful soul! We all have some flaws and no one is perfect. True beauty and attraction is being confident in your own skin and being happy for who you are!

 

Time Is Precious, Don't Waste it!

Sometimes we may postpone our plans waiting for the 'right' time but accomplished nothing in the end! 

Procrastination is the thief of time, it cause delays, disorientation and missed opportunities. In my honest opinion, there is NO PERFECT timing for anything, so be flexible and realistic. Create opportunities in the present. If you are always waiting for a "Miracle", you may end up waiting for years and feeling disappointed when you lost all the motivation and passion when your age is catching up. 

Don't waste your time and find more excuses... Focus what you really want and do it NOW! I regret wasted so much time in the wrong jobs, people, places and choices that I wish I could undo my mistakes but now, I truly know what I want and my purpose in life.

The Perfect Dream Lover Don't Exist!

No marriages or relationship is all sunshine and lovey-dovey. Yes, I am a hopeless romantic who believes in true love, but the ecstatic and infinity love story of "Romeo & Juliet" don't exist in the real world. Every couples have some issues and good relationships are built on a strong foundation with patience, trust, forgiveness, empathy, support and surviving the storms together.

Don't Tell Anyone Everything

A friend today could be an enemy tomorrow! Don't be too trusting with people, not everyone is genuine and loyal to you. They could be smiling in front of you and stab you at the back. A fake and jealous 'friend' could betray you anytime, so the less information they know, the safer you are, what people don't know can't be ruined.😘

        

Hope Is NOT A Strategy

People will tell you "Not to lose hope..." but these are words of comfort that doesn't serve much purpose nor solutions, but don't get me wrong, I am not saying we should give up hope, but 'Hope' itself is NEVER a strategy. If you want to achieve something in life, you have to work for your goals. "Hoping" will never do anything for you when there is zero action. Every success and victory requires hard work, good strategies and consistent efforts. False hopes are more dangerous than fears!

Talk Is Cheap

People will letyou down and promises will be broken. Don't expect too much from others or believe everything they said. Pay attention and watch their actions instead. If their words and actions don't match, stop serving good vibes to those who deserve goodbye! Never try to hurt a kind person and think it is alright to apologize later. Even the nicest people have their limits. They may never forgive you for the broken trust and the emotional scars.

Treat everyone with respect. It's ok to be angry, but it is NOT ok to be cruel! One grave mistake can result serious consequences permanently and living with guilt is tormenting. So always remind yourself to think before you speak and act, because sorry are just words that can't fix everything.

Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone

We are living in a world of judgement, prejudices and deception. No matter what you do, you'll get judged anyway. Never give anyone the power to control your mind and manipulate your emotions. Their criticisms and opinions don't feed you or pay your bills. Be wise to ignore the negativity and those who try to put you down. You are in charge of your happiness and life is too short to worry about how others see you. Get out of the shell and express yourself. Live life to the fullest and always do what makes you happy! 😎       

             

 

Everyone will have some regrets at some point in life. I've been there and done that! but don't look back, we are not going that way! Forgive yourself for the mistakes but remember the lessons. 

                     

Life has many amazing ways to teach us everyday and each time you fall, you learn to get up STRONGER with the wisdom and courage inside you. Remember, the past version of yourself is so proud of how far you've achieved and the best is yet to come!

"Sparkle Up and Keep Shining!"⭐🌞

✅ Self-Care Tips For Moms

Ok Mommies, now that the kids are back to school, you deserve some 'me-time' to relax and revitalize! Parenting is a lot of hard work, commitments, responsibilities and the list goes on...

This year, I can finally have more time for myself when both my kids are in the same school. For parents who have a Jubilee baby (SG50), I'm sure you were feeling anxious and excited for their first day in primary school. (I took lots of photos & videos on that special day!😊) My daughter is adapting well and make many new friends, I'm glad she didn't cry and she enjoy going to school with her elder brother.

Having the extra hours to myself is a luxury of freedom that I've been waiting for so long...Well, if you have a helper/nanny, grandparents, in-laws or any relatives who can help you out with the little ones, (lucky you!) you probably won't resonate my excitement, but for many moms like myself who are literally the sole caregiver for our kids with no helper, no in-laws/guardians and a hubby who works long hours/oversea etc..(I feel you and I'm so proud of you..Well done, Mommies!) You gotta' give yourself credits for the versatility and multi-tasking! Nonetheless, all mothers deserve the recognition for the unconditional love and sacrifices for the family.👍

The lunar new year festive is the busiest time for moms and the current outbreak narrative is intoxicating and disheartening. It greatly affect our emotions and morale, so it's important that we practice daily self-care to maintain healthy physical & mental well-being.

Here are some Self-Care Tips / Ideas and my personal advice for busy Moms :

1. Be Organised. (Plan Your Time)

It's never easy balancing work and family life, but with proper time management and good habits, you can get the jobs done on schedule.

Prioritize the important/urgent tasks and set a daily/weekly routine for work, kids, couple time, family bonding, house chores, etc..A routine will guide you to manage the daily tasks productively. 

Don't overwork. The truth is, work will never end! Always spend quality time with your children and your partner at the end of the day.

For me, my children comes first and my family will always be my top priority. I am grateful that I am financially stable, I prefer to work for myself, to have the flexibility to schedule my work at my own pace, doing things that I desire!

2. Take Catnap.(30 - 45 mins)

A power nap during mid-day is a great booster, it allows our body & mind to relax and recharge in a hibernate mode. When we have enough rest, we feel refreshed, more energetic and function better. Happiness is an afternoon nap! 💤

3. Eat Well & Drink More Water. (Enjoy Your Favorite Food)

Food are great pleasure and comfort! Good food brings good mood! When I have a busy schedule with writing assignments and zoom sessions, I hardly have time to sit down comfortably to enjoy a warm, decent meal. It's usually a quick bite or instant food,lol..But now, I can have long, undisturbed lunch, enjoying my flower tea and eating my favorite sushi in my Snoopy pajamas!😅

4. Talk To A Friend. (Call, Text, Facetime!)

Deep conversations/chatting with a good friend is heartwarming..You'll feel much better after you talk it out and release your emotions. Everyone needs a good listener, someone who is supportive, who understand the situations and never judge. If you have a dear friend who is willing to listen to your endless rants with patience and kindness, cherish that special bond & friendship, true friends are blessings!

5. Beauty Routines. (Look Good For Yourself!)

Pamper yourself and be nice to your body. Take a long bath, style up your hair or wear a new outfit! Looking good makes you feel great and confident. In my opinion, fashion and grooming shouldn't stop when you become a mother and every mom can look her best! "Mommy, when is the last time you paint your nails? do your make-up? and visit the spa/salons?" Maybe it's time to indulge and shower yourself some tender loving care. 😘

6. Listen To Music.(Sing, Dance, TikTok!)

Music is the best therapy! It creates a fun and lively ambiance. Whenever I feel under the weather, I would sing out loud, make random Tiktok videos, play my Ukulele / Guitar and it makes me feel better instantly. Like a magic pill, music never fails to brighten up my day! 🌞

       

I firmly believe that Music has the power to inspire, to heal and to connect our deep emotions. Through many tough times and struggles as a mother, music is always there for me and it's been a huge part of my life now..I guess you can't go wrong with music! 😎

7. Stay Calm and Control Your Emotions. (Protect Your Peace!)

Random topics, news, events and people may trigger some tensions and conflicts. Keep your cool and chill! Be wise and walk away from bad vibes and drama. Be selective, don't fight battles that don't matter! Not everything requires your reaction and attention. Sometimes, PEACE is better than being right!

It's Okay To Not Be Okay...

Motherhood is exhausting, demanding and a relentless journey, some days are intense and insane! 

But it's normal to experience negative emotions, frustrations, disappointments and meltdowns... but remember, DO NOT trap yourself in a 'mental prison'. Divert your thoughts, visions and focus on the positivity in every situation. The bad days will pass! 

    

Listen to your body and don't be too hard on yourself. Don't feel guilty if you can't do everything in a day, it's never selfish to take a break and rest...You don't need to be a Wonder Woman to save the world! We are only humans, it's OK to take one step at a time.

You are in charge of your own happiness! Self-care is much needed in our drastic lifestyle today, it is imperative that mothers need to replenish physical & emotional energy in order to provide the best care for the family. 

            

Be kind to yourself and take time to do what makes you happy. Make Self-care a priority every day! 🥰

"Live Well, Laugh Often, Love Much!"❤

What's your daily self-care tips? Share with me and comment below! 😉

(*Disclaimer : The information provided on this blog is based on personal experience and for reference purposes. No medical advice intended. Please consult your local healthcare physicians for diagnosis and medical treatments - Mommywarrior77)