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Showing posts with label homemaker. Show all posts
Showing posts with label homemaker. Show all posts

04 September 2020

The Myths Of Motherhood ⚠️




Ok mama! I'm sure we've all heard some myths of motherhood.

I remember when I became a mother. Friends, relatives and even random strangers will offer some interesting information about motherhood; the classic myths, the old wives tales but sadly, social phenomenon can sometimes do more harm than help and that makes motherhood a lot harder than it is. 


Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love being a mom and I'm thankful to have 2 lovely children but the struggle is real! From conception, pregnancy, childbirth, breastfeeding and parenting...The different stages of motherhood brings different emotions of excitement, fear, joy and many overwhelming experiences. 


The journey of motherhood is challenging but it's definitely worth it! However, many misinformation and misconceptions can often caused moms to get judged brutally and unfairly, these myths impact many moms that made them feel bad, guilty and shamed. 


Here are some myths that I have heard, in my journey of motherhood...

Myth #1 : "Breastfeeding help you lose weight..."

Well, I heard this one all the time but too bad it didn't work for me!Lol. I breastfeed for about 15months for my firstborn and the truth is (*at least in my personal experience) I get super hungry after I breastfeed many times a day and I actually eat more, I don't see a significant drop on the scale so this one is busted! (*for me)


Myth #2 : "Breastfeeding is a natural thing!" 

We all know "Breast Is Bestand I fully support breastfeeding campaigns and giving our babies the best nutrients, but sometimes it's not always easy for new mothers. Breastfeeding is a process that requires patience, determination and proper techniques.


Personally, I love the bonding and the skin-to-skin contact when I nurse my baby but breastfeeding can be uncomfortable, exhausting and inconvenience especially when you are in public places and there is no nursing room nearby. It can be quite embarrassing when the milk leaks, imagine walking around with a soaked blouse, oh gosh! Nonetheless, my breastfeeding journey has been a memorable experience but I don't miss it! 😅


I strongly believe every mom wants the best for their child so whether you breastfeed for a month, for a year or even longer, it doesn't make you less or more of a mother. 

I see many new moms struggling with breastfeeding, feeling immense shame for poor lactation and blaming themselves for not providing enough breast milk. Please don't be too hard on yourself, mummies! Not all moms have a milk supply of a fountain. Breastfeed as long as you can and it's OK to stop when you need to. 




Myth #3 : "A mom should dress like a mom." 

This is one hilarious remark! I mean seriously, is there actually a mom's 'outfit'? Ok, I get the point but in my opinion, I feel that every mom should allow to dress whatever that makes them feel beautiful, comfortable and confident. There is nothing wrong if the mom wants to wear the mini skirt or that bikini, etc...The way we dress has nothing to do with the status of motherhood.  


Myth #4 : "You are the mom, you should fix the problems!"

We often see people pointing fingers and start blaming the poor mother when the child misbehaved. People are too quick to judge without a clue what exactly happened. Hang on! Moms are not problem solvers, we are only humans. Be kind to mothers, we are learning, we trying very hard everyday, we get tired and we made mistakes too. Be more supportive and encouraging instead of mom-shaming. 


Myth #5 : "Csection isn't a real birth..." 

The controversy of Cesarean vs Natural Birth is totally pointless. What matters most is the safety of the baby and the mother. 

I had Csect twice, probably the most nerve-wrecking ordeal of my life when the gynecologist told me I had to go for an emergency c-section when the dilation was slow. I was scared and didn't know what to expect but I didn't care about the procedure and how long the recovery would takes, all I wanted was to bring my baby out safely. 


Not all labors are fast and smooth, some are long and traumatic. The birthing methods should never define the labor of love and motherhood. All births are amazing, it doesn't matter how it happens, both takes much courage and strength.💪😎



Myth #6 : "You will enjoy being a mom every day!" 

As much as I love my kids and they are my world, but there are some days I wish I can take a day off, just relax, do my own stuff and hang out with my besties. Kids can sometimes get you so annoyed and stressed-out with their constant whining and tantrums. We all have bad days, mummies need a little break and some space too. 


Myth #7 : "Asking for help is a sign of weakness..."

No, surely not! Mothers are multi-taskers and they play many roles. It is not humanly possible to manage everything alone! We all need help from time to time, so don't feel weak to ask for help, it's better to get some help than dealing with all the meltdowns that could affect your emotions and mental well-being.


As mothers, we need to take care of ourselves first in order to take care of the children and our family. Don't be afraid to reach out for some support and assistance. 



The judgement from society can be unjustified and cruel, we need to detach the myths of motherhood from reality, besides, there is no fixed formula for motherhood. Every child and every situation is different, do not let negative beliefs and stereotype criticism affect your role as a mother. Do what is best for your children and the family! 😉

"A mother's love is instinctual, unconditional and forever..."



What are some interesting myths you heard, share with me and comment below.






28 February 2019

Love Builds A Happy Home ❤️🏡


I love children.

I've always dreamed of having a big family with lots of kids around the house. I love their innocent minds and purest hearts. Their lovely smiles and funny giggle always warms my heart! 😍


Raising a kid here in Singapore is pretty expensive, so two is just perfect for me and I'm very thankful to be blessed with 2 beautiful kids in my life. I admit I'm not the most patient mum in the world, but I'll always protect them, love them with all my heart and provide them the best I could. That is my promise, my responsibility to my children and I'll never break that promise!



Some days, my kids made me really upset and drive me nuts, but as a mother, you'll always see the beauty in them and forgive them anyway. No mothers I know would ever hold grudges against their own children.


Hence, parenting is a challenging journey. Personally, I feel that every child is unique in their own ways so I wouldn't want to compare them with anyone and I don't follow a fixed formula in parenting because a lot of answers are never found in books. To me, it's all about trial & error and being flexible for your child's needs, but that's just my opinion.



I'm sharing some thoughts on family life and parenting today because I feel strongly for my close friends (mothers too) who shared with me how tired and frustrated they are, to manage everything alone when their husband is at work or out of town for months. I could relate to how they feel because my hubby works long hours too, sometimes, I feel so exhausted doing the endless house chores and mothering the kids at the same time. 


There are days when I am so busy with the kids and my online biz that I hardly have much time to blog. Most days, I only get a few hours of sleep. (But that's fine, I don't sleep a lot anyway.lol)


It gets worse when you are unwell and didn't have time to rest when you don't have any source of help near you.. No nanny, helper, in-laws, grandparents or someone you trust to help you out... Can you imagine how crazy and stressful it is, with zero help?... Homemakers are not made of steel, we need rest too, like everyone else!


All I could do was give my friends hugs for comfort and support. Lend them my ears to listen, whenever they want to vent their frustrations and unhappiness. 


Besides the struggle...Do you realize that Mothers are always the ones who get judged and blamed? It is no wonder they are so stressed out and emotionally drained when they get judged almost everything...ALL THE TIME!


Say for example, when the kids misbehaved, show bad manners and attitude or get into some troubles, everyone starts pointing fingers at the mothers but rarely at fathers. Hmmm, but isn't parenting suppose to be a teamwork?... Well, I don't think it's right to blame only the Mums for bad parenting. Ah yes! I know Dads are the sole breadwinners, they work very hard every day to provide for the family, but a Daddy's role is equally important in parenting.


Actually, I have seen some good Daddies around lately. I think the new-age Dads are very cool! I must say I'm really impressed by how dedicated and devoted some fathers are. 



I once heard a Daddy singing "Baby Shark" to his toddler on a long bus ride, even when he sang out of tune, lol..I still think that was really sweet! Men are often viewed as a muscular and manly figure, so when a Dad sings a kid song or nursery rhymes to his child in public...Wow! You got my attention, Mister! Thumbs up, Daddy! 👍 


I feel that in order to build a happy family, both Mummies and Daddies have to be involved in parenting because they are the ones who shape the kid's personalities and the person they grow up to be.


My point is, parenting is a team effort! It is never only the Mummy's or Daddy's duty to do certain roles, it's all about supporting each other and teaching the children the right things as parents. 


Keep in mind that your spouse is your life partner, not a slave or a machine, it's not humanly possible for anyone to take all the roles in parenting alone. Do not take anyone or anything for granted. Your partner needs support, your attention, understanding and appreciation too. 



The children are your labor of love..Therefore, both Mummy and Daddy play the most important roles in the parenting journey. Kids learn from their parents, always! When you show love, respect and kindness to others. Chances are, your kids are more likely to follow the same way you did and become loving adults in the years to come.


Parenting is never easy because we all have emotions and bad days too, that is why you need support from your partner when you feel emotional or need some time-out! In my opinion, there is no perfect parenting nor a perfect family, only responsible parents who work hand in hand together. 



A warm and happy family isn't built overnight, it takes years, a lot of patience and hard work from both parents...But together, you can build a happy family so long as you work as a team... and happy home, raise happy kids! 👦👧

Let me know what's your thoughts on Parenting / Parenthood? 

Happy Parenting, Mummies & Daddies! 😘 

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