Words are powerful weapons and the last thing a mom need is someone making her feel bad about herself.
Give the mother some support, words of encouragement instead of criticism and judgments. So before you make a remark, try to avoid insensitive, unkind and hurtful phrases that may upset the mothers.
Things You Should Never Say To Moms :
"You look so tired."
Mothers are tired. Especially those with newborns or younger children without any helpers or nannies/in-laws/childcare, etc. Most mothers don't get enough sleep every day. They are always busy attending to their kids, cleaning up the house, fixing meals and running daily errands, etc. Whether you are a stay-at-home mom or working moms, there are days you don't look your best. There is no need to remind them how tired or messy their hair looks.
"When are you having another child?"
Having a child is a personal decision. There are many important things to consider when you are planning for another baby.
Whenever someone asks me to try for #3, I floored! (Are you serious?) Yes! I love children but that doesn't mean I want a 'dozen' lol. When I think about pregnancy, the awful morning sickness and the horrible contractions. Oh no! I am very sure I'm done with childbirth. Two is just enough. Thank you very much! 😁
"You should breastfeed longer..."
Breastfeeding is exhausting and it's not always easy for mothers. It can be quite embarrassing when the milk leaks in public and sometimes you can't find a nursing room to feed your hungry baby, so it's not always convenient to breastfeed on demand.
We know 'Breast Is Best' but there are many valid reasons why some mothers don't breastfeed longer, we should respect their decisions and STOP mom-shaming. It is OK to give the baby formula, that doesn't make you are a bad mother. I breastfeed for 15months, though it isn't very long, but I think I did fine.
"Why are your kids so skinny/chubby...What did you feed them?"
Oh my gosh! This is one of the most annoying and rude remarks to a mother. Not all children eat anything that is served on the table. Many kids are fussy and picky eaters. I am sure all mothers feed their children with nutrition because we want our children to grow strong and healthy, but some kids just aren't good eaters. I used to stress a lot about their weight but now I came to understand that being healthy is more important than the numbers on the scale!
"Sleep when the baby sleeps..."
Ermm...I hear this all the time but it's not always possible. In fact, when the baby sleeps, it's the best time to do some house chores, have a quick meal, pump out the milk and take a shower etc...When my kids were babies, they sleep in the cot and I would watch them sleep, to make sure they are safe and secure. Personally, I don't feel comfortable to sleep when the baby sleeps, especially when they are still little.
"Your house is a Toys'R'us! " (LOL)
"Your child cries a lot!"
No mothers want to hear that from anyone. It's really heartbreaking and distressing when a child cries! The helpless mom could be feeling scared, frustrated and trying her best to stop the crying drama! That remark doesn't serve anything, it only create more anxiety and make the mother panic!
"Don't spoil the kids!"
OK, that one makes sense and I get the point, but trust me, it's easy to say than done! We love our children and we want to give them the best, don't we? In my opinion, protecting the children, giving them love and attention is never spoiling a child, but that's just me.
"Kids will be kids..."
Well yeah! I know that's true but that doesn't mean we should condone bad behavior. Discipline is an important part of parenting. Well, say for example, if your child got badly hurt or bullied by other kids and the parent tells you, "Kids will be kids..." Wow! how would you feel?
Bad conduct/behavior is unacceptable and should not be ignored. As parents, it is our responsibility to teach our kids what's right and wrong.
"Stop worrying so much about your kids!"
The moment you become a mother, the worries never stop! You may worry lesser, but you will still be worried about the kids, always!...
My dear mama still worried about me when I skipped meals and when I didn't reply to her text messages. Typically, a mother never stops worrying. Maternal love, I suppose...❤️
Sometimes, words might seem unintentional and harmless to you but it matters to others, so be tactful for the choice of words you use.
...and if you are not sure what to say to a mother, always praise her for the hard work and tell her she is doing a great job! Be supportive and gracious always! 😘
So Mommies, what are some interesting remarks you have heard? Share with me and comment below.
Blogger Mommywarrior77
ibu mana yg tak tensen kan. tapi hadap ja. hidup ni adalah perjalanan dan keindahann dalam menjalaninya demi akhirat sana ^_^
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